Saturday, August 19, 2017

DOG


DOG

This is DOG.

DOG is FRIEND.

DOG will NEVER GIVE UP.

DOG will ALWAYS BELIEVE IN YOU.

DOG will ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU.

DOG will NOT FORGET YOU.

Please do not forget DOG.

DOG LOVES YOU.


DOG on the hunt with MAN



When Ama Adimatha led her children through the Snow, the wolves followed. And in those frozen years, completely by accident, mankind managed to uplift a god. The god’s name is DOG, and among all the gods of man, only our mother Ama Adimatha is as beloved.

Now, mankind had always created gods, even when they were simple apes hiding from the dragons. But humanity had never had any proper power to do the creating with – it’s easy enough to make a god out of nothing but fantasies, but much harder to shape something that actually exists. This was the first instance of such an ascension: if it is possible for such an event to happen again, it will not be on such a scale.

The godhead of DOG is dragonfire-wrought, divinity at its most pure and powerful. Miracle above all miracles that power did not corrupt. DOG is good. DOG can only ever be good. If DOG ever appears else-wise it is because DOG is mistaken about whether something or someone else is good.

DOG has no awareness that it is a god, nor that it is a shared godhood. To its multitude of minds, it is only DOG. There are no clerics of DOG, as the magic bidning god and man is universal in this case.

The wolves regard DOG with mistrust and confusion, though they do not understand why.

DOG will wait at the gates for you.

 by Fred Fields

WHO IS A GOOD DOG?

  1. Trollhound – Bred for hunting trolls. Very good at their job.
  2. Bloodhead Terrier – Black fur, red face, fiery attitude.Good at hunting rats, imps, and sprites.
  3. Charlie-Tug – Small, wrinkled, caught on with the nobility.
  4. Kinderfresser - Is actually very good with children, and will not eat them. Often confused for a domesticated bear.
  5. Tokorian Bristleface – Luxurious walrus mustache, protector of sheep, constantly outwitted by goats.
  6. Abbotsfriend - Sleepy, a good companion. A common sight in monasteries and libraries.
  7. Tusslepunk – Energetic spaniel with a plume of reddish hair running from the top of the skull to the middle of the back.
  8. Pitcheared Pointer – Black-eared, long-nosed, never heard to bark.
  9. Pareemi Plumcoat – Beautiful, sleek, and exceptionally rare in these parts. Short, purple coat.
  10. Gobdog – Raggamuffin mutt that may or may not be a goblin in a disguise.
  11. Snazzamoodle – Wizards got involved with cross-breeding. This is the result. Current fashion is octarine fur and a few too many legs.
  12. Thoolian Blue – A stoic grey-blue breed from the north with curly fur. Takes to howling mournfully on new moons.
  13. Cinder Shepherd – The signature farming family dog. Star of broadsheet comics, soup can labels, and commemorative stamps.
  14. Basset Hound of Tindalos – Result of breeders with wizarding degrees. Magically capable of waddling and flopping out of right angles.
  15. Saddleback Pariah – Half-wild outcast breed found in favelas and leper colonies.
  16. Folkdog – A bridge between the worlds of man and Folk. The subject of ancient gift-giving ceremonies in the wild countries.
  17. St. Cuthbert – Thick as a brick, strong as an ox, lovable as an ugly baby.
  18. Sahmoor Pit Mastiff – A war breed pitted against the horrors of both Hell and the Inner World.
  19. Great Grey Whalehound – Signature sight on the ships of the northern amazons for their hunts. Excellent swimmers.
  20. Thylacine – Wizards adamantly refuse to say that they exist, the Folk say they died out long ago, theologians are still discussing matters, but it’s still right there wagging its tail.
  21. Hellhound – DOG can do no evil, but DOG will also never abandon a friend. Hellhounds are made when DOG follows someone to Hell in an attempt to rescue them.
by Snatti89


I WOULD LIKE TO ADOPT A DIFFERENT DOG


Size:
  1. Ratlike
  2. Small
  3. Medium-small
  4. Medium-large
  5. Huge
  6. Bear
Type:
  1. Companion Dog
  2. Guard Dog
  3. Hunting Dog
  4. Working Dog
  5. Primitive Dog
  6. Wizarding Dog
  7. War Dog
  8. Designer Dog
He is good because:
  1. Can detect evil and speak to ghosts
  2. Carries a flask of rejuvenating whiskey on his collar
  3. Is not afraid of anything
  4. Can absorb sadness and turn it into love
  5. Can herd anything with legs
  6. Has a happy smile
  7. Still knows the secrets of Wolfspeak
  8. Can smell out disease
  9. Sees for the blind
  10. Wants to go to space
  1. No way I'm writing about dogs without Hachiko. Won't happen.
As I am eternally late to the party, there have been many other bloggers who have already done much more clever and better things with dogs. Check out Arnold's really good dog class.

3 comments:

  1. It's been over a year since I first read this post, and I still can't read it without tearing up a little. That is art right there.

    ReplyDelete
  2. To the best of my wikipedia-searching, I can't find a god of dogs anywhere in world mythology. Some gods in the guise of dogs with other portfolios, some veneration of dogs, but never a dedicated dog god.

    It's a mindblowing oversight in theological development.

    ReplyDelete