Sunday, February 1, 2026

Burgeoning Blogs 2

 Let's keep this ball rolling.

> Part 3
> Part 4  

26. How could I go about acquiring a gryphon mount? 
Either raise one from an egg (not easy) or impress one with a feat of valor (also not easy, but typically faster) - the latter will usually involve killing a specific griffin's enemy or rival (often a manticore, as they fill similar predatory niches)

27. How difficult is it to be brought back from the dead? Is such a thing even possible? 

Impossible: attempts to maintain the soul’s cohesion after bodily death is the territory of mad wizards. Shades can be summoned up pretty easily, but that’s because they’re one component of the soul and aren’t conscious entities. 

28. How do you deal with any jitters or nerves before running a game? 
I’m usually chomping at the bit before a game, rather than jittery. The difficulty is getting me into the starting position.

29. How do you determine if a character can successfully swim in your games? 
I just presume that they can, unless given reason to believe otherwise (they’re a dwarf, they’re made of stone, they’re from a desert, the player arbitrarily decides their character can’t swim), in which case I will ask the player.

30. How do you determine the weather for the day or season in your game? 
I have never actually done this, so probably with a hex flower or random table or just like, a Farmer’s Almanac from the 1800s or something.

31. How do you feel about writing directly in RPG books? Forbidden or useful? 
I don’t do it for the same reason I don’t write in the margins of normal books - I rewrite or correct things often enough that it will just turn into a mess of crossouts and eraser burns.

32. How do you handle a shy/quiet player? What about a spotlight hungry one? 
Both of these are tied up in the same general idea, which is making sure to cycle through my players with some leading questions re: what their character is doing or feeling. 

33. How do you make particularly efficient weapons stand out from inefficient ones?
Low-quality weapons have a higher chance of breaking & doing less damage; high quality ones will have a higher minimum damage or better chance to hit.

34. How do you roll dice? In the open, behind a screen, let the players roll? 

In the open, players make their own rolls. I do a lot of DMing while standing so a screen is usually of limited use to me.

35. How do your players deal with losing a character? How do you get ’em back in play? 

If they die early enough in the game that they’d be sitting around for a while, I’ll hand them a hireling, already-introduced NPC, or just a rando who would make even a bit of sense for the party to run into. They can then decide if they want to keep playing as that character or roll up a new one for the next session. If I really need to keep them in, they can be the ghost of their PC.

36. How has access to magic influenced technology in your setting? 

I tend to say that the existence of magic allows for anachronistic jumps forward in scientific fields, with sanitation, medicine, food production and astronomy being the big ticket items. Like instead of turning magic into a sub-field of science, magic is a tool to help you do science. An advantage to this is that I can keep exactly what the magic is vague for ease-of-use and narrative convenience while still keeping the societal effects. Some examples:

  • Field-specific craft-magic means that everything's just a bit higher quality than it would be in reality. Items last longer and work better, and craftsmen are able to do more with less.
    • Ex. If I give glassmakers are bit of vaguely-defined trade magic, I can say that made the development of lenses just a touch easier which allows me to say that microscopes and telescopes show up earlier (in-universe equivalent of the Classical period, for ease of player reference) and I can skip right over geocentrism and humorism.
  • If demons exist, people will have to develop a reliable means of diagnosing possessions, which I can lead to a earlier conceptualization of mental illness.

This is, if I think about it for any time at all, a very idiosyncratic approach to magic (or at least one I don't recall seeing anywhere besides like, the occasional tumblr post) and I don’t actually think it’s based on any specific influence. I just think real-life space science is cool and want to have characters know about it.

37. How have video games/other media influenced the way you approach these games? 
Fear and Hunger’s tightly woven and multiple-solution dungeon/world design is a thing of beauty and very worth emulating, especially how open-ended and complex it manages to be without bogging down the player in verbs and tools. It’s something I had tried to do in Unicorn Meat, but of course I wrote that before I knew about or played Fear and Hunger

38. How long does it take to have a custom set of armor made? A weapon? 

1-4 downtimes, depending on what you’re asking for.

39. How long is your average session? Have they ever gone longer than expected? Why? 
Usually 2-3 hours. If they go longer it’s usually because there’s only a little left and it’s less hassle than scheduling a second session.

40. How much are lifestyle expenses for your PCs "between adventures?" 
I’ve never considered this a particularly interesting thing to track;  I greatly prefer Delta Green’s downtime actions.

41 How much time do you spend preparing between games? What's that look like? 

A lot of bullet points and boxes connected with arrows, doesn’t matter if it’s a premade module or something I made. Time spent is dependent on how much text I need to compile and how much compiling I need to do to make it usable.

42. How were you Introduced to these games? Share your history with them! 
I saw some 3e books at Borders in ye olden days, but didn’t really play them until I got to college and took up an offer from someone in the fantasy/sci-fi book club. I know I had been collecting the odd free pdf before then, but I didn’t get around to playing until later.

43. How would a player go about brewing their own potion or making a scroll? 
They’d need the recipe / magical formula they want to use, and then downtime action(s) to do it.

44. How would you describe a 60' x 60' square room with 4 cardinal doors to the players? 
Material, temperature, smell, contents, art on walls / ceiling / floor, sound (in-room and from adjacent rooms).

45. How would you handle a party wanting to start a business or enterprise? 
I background it to one of two rolls made during downtime: how is the business doing, and has anything noteworthy happened?

46. Is it possible to play as something unusual in your setting? A dragon, balrog, minotaur? 

I love me a Star Wars cantina, but I try to be cognizant of the fact that it’s extremely easy to make a setting dull and samey by going for quantity over quality. Part of my method for avoiding this is  just saying “there’s a lot of variety you can get from ‘humans only’ if you interpret monopods as humans”; the other part is to try and keep the special options rooted in place and context, instead of treating them like another variety of human.

Example: if you want to play a minotaur, cool! You’re going to be one of the White Bull’s thousand sons. You’re immortal, everyone in the world knows what happened to your mother, all your brothers hate you (feeling’s mutual), and your father is an eldritch abomination locked inside a maze at the bottom of some Atlantean ruins.

D&D has a habit of genericizing and sterilizing mythic monsters and that’s a large part of why using them as the quote unquote exotic player options always strikes me as a failure of imagination. Like you’re stripping out the core of the monster, there goes your main avenue of reinterpretation.

47. Is magic innate or something that can be learned by anyone? Why? 
I roll with “learned by anyone” as the default, with innate magic generally caused by external influences (you got too close to a Powerful Magical Thing, usually). It’s never going to be a strictly heritable feature, because I fucking hate the fantasy genre’s obsession with magic eugenics. Fuck right off the edge of my dick with that shit, how about you try ripping off someone who isn’t Queen Terf of Wet Island for a change, Jesus Christ. (Yes I know the trope is older than that but most modern fantasy authors aren't ripping off particularly far back sources, you know?)

48. Is there a particular system or game that you are excited to run or play? Tell me about it! 
Before life got in the way, there were plans for Layla to run Mythic Bastionland for myself and a couple other friends. Was really looking forward to that; was the first time Into the Odd mechanics really clicked for me - amazing what changing the wording from “hit points” to “guard” can do. I was going to be the Emerald Knight, the most normal of the band,

49. Is there some kind of banking system/safe storage of treasure in your setting? 
If you’re friends with the moldywarps (and you should be, they’re cute little mole-people), they’ll gladly hold on to your valuables for you. It’s not really a bank, though, more just a favor for a friend: you aren’t insured, you accrue no interest, and sometimes the moldywarps will exchange your item for something “just as good” (according to their own non- monetary standards)

50. Let me hear about your fave character/NPC from a game! What made 'em special? 
Gotta be Ayo my drunken BEEFSTRONK tiefling monk. Longest-running character I’ve ever had.
 

Tuesday, January 27, 2026

Burgeoning Blogs 1

The ever-incredible ktrey over at d4Caltrops had a recent 1d100 table of potential blogpost topics: in my infinite wisdom I am going to shotgun the gamut and answer every single one of them. Split up into four posts of 25 each for my own sanity.

> Part 3
> Part 4 


1. Are phones/devices permitted at your table? How do you handle distractions?
I don’t have a rule against it. If people are really getting distracted, I'll throw them one of the softball “how does your character do X?” prompts to get them back in.


2. Are spellcasters rare? Common? How do "normal" people feel about them? 
Spells like "snap your fingers and light a match", "fix a clean break in a broken object" and "find the lost object that you swear you just set down" are an everyday part of life. Cunning men / women, witches, spirit mediums and other low-power practitioners are found basically everywhere, and are highly valued in their communities.

Mid-power practitioners (roughly where a magic-specialist PC would be) are not uncommon, and attitudes are more ambivalent. A letter of introduction from an initiatory society won’t smooth over everything, but it will help a traveling mage.

High-power practitioners (traditional wizards with the hat and tower & so on) are rare and considered extremely dangerous (for many well-attested reasons).


3. Are there secret societies or factions hiding in your world? Tell me about one!
I am habitually incapable of resisting cheeky references to SCP deep lore that no one else will get, regardless of what game I am running, though the actual group of interest I use is context-dependent. The most likely ones will be the occult historical factions (Daevites, Ortothans, Nalkans, and Mekhanists) appearing as mystery religions, since they lend themselves extremely well to evoking vast secrets lost to time.


4. Are there any interesting holidays/festivals in your world? 
One off the dome: an isolated village whose midsummer festival entails a giant red and white orb descends from the sky and gives each inhabitant an amorphous, blobby tie-die sculpture sort of thing with no apparent purpose or design. Then the orb leaves, the sculptures are installed next to the family shrine, and next year they are returned to the orb in exchange for new sculptures.

No one knows why this happens.


5. Are there any recurring jokes or humorous call-backs that occur in your games? 
At some point, there will be a skull with the name DENNIS carved into its forehead.


6. Are there constellations in your setting? Can you describe four of them? 
It's never come up, but if I had to do it on the fly I would rename existing constellations and probably mix different traditions together while doing it. Proper names would be swapped out but the titles would probably stay the same or be similar i.e. Taurus would be the Bison or the Bonnacon, the Dippers would be the Raccoon Brothers, Orion would be the Amazon, etc.


7. Are you working on your own system? What makes it stand out from others? 
My great open secret is that I generally don’t put high value on rulesets as a whole, and tend to treat them as modular assortments of mechanics (sorted by broad genus) that can be tweaked and recombined as needed.

Which is to say I have tried making my own system, but found no reason to see those projects through when I can just use what other people have made.


8. Can one buy magic items in your setting? Where would one go about doing this? 

There are two kinds of magical item, far as I'm concerned: those that inherently have magical properties (phoenix feathers, bonnacon turds, basilisk eyes, etc) and those that have been imbued with magical properties intentionally by a practitioner. Both can be bought, though the former is much easier to acquire than the latter since you can just go on down to the shop and pick up some mandrake root; to get a bespoke enchantment you need to find someone willing and able to do the enchantment, and then they'll need time and resources to make it happen.


9. Describe 4 things that qualify for deity disfavor and cause clerics to lose powers
In increasing order of severity (exact likelihood and specifics depend on the deity):

  1. Violation of ritual praxis by accident or ignorance
    • If you don't know or flub up the proper rites but are doing your honest best, most popular gods will let it slide. 
  2. Minor violations of ethical praxis
    • Overlooking minor sins is basically required in order to maintain a human priesthood, though all gods will get fed up with it eventually if left unaddressed for too long.
  3. Ritual impurity 
    • This will often be an instant disfavor, though will usually only last until the follower has ritually purified themselves; the more charitable gods will make exceptions for emergency situations (ex. violating dietary prohibitions under duress in order to save someone's life)
  4. Knowing violation of ritual praxis / desecration of sacred space
    •  Getting sloppy with rites can be tolerated to a (usually very small extent), but deliberate transgression is going to have pretty immediate consequences. 
  5. Extreme violations of praxis or sacred space
    •  This is the part of the gradient where violators are going to get their asses cursed or smote.
  6. Uncategorized Fucking Around
    •  Circumstances where the only natural outcome is Finding Out.


10. Describe a few pieces of expensive jewelry one might find in a dragon's hoard.

  1. Jade and silver torc of two entwined serpents  from the 18th Dynasty of Thuria
  2. Gold and lapis lazuli headdress of an exorcist-priestess of Nan-Sul-Gara
  3. Amber nose stud with preserved insect of unknown provenance unknown
  4. Marble touch-sculpture of the blind and bat-like Venusians; is actually biting political satire
  5. Amulet containing the left navigular bone of Saint Jomo the Mortitian.
  6. An electrum medallion; it menaces with spikes of obsidian; it is engraved with the image of an elephant and a dwarf in electrum: the elephant is striking down the dwarf; the elephant is on fire; the dwarf is screaming.


11. Describe a near death situation or TPK that you've been a part of at the table
The one time I played Mutant Year Zero (right before covid kicked off), the entire party died from radiation poisoning two hexes away from home because we didn’t have a scout. Mistakes were made.


12. Describe an occasion where a die roll or randomizer had everyone surprised! 

It’s been long enough since I’ve played regularly that I don’t have any good examples on hand.


13. Describe one big "mover and shaker" or local lord/lady in your world. 

I’ve yet to settle on a name for her, but there’s a drow / lilu / kin-yani diplomat-sorceress who’s one of those 4D plate-spinner types. She’s the overseer for a major (but relatively new) trade relationship between the surface and the subterrene, and has acquired an impressive number of enemies from both sides. A woman with a lot of use for deniable assets.


14. Do all dwarfs have beards or only certain ones? Why? 

Not all of them, but they’re common for both sexes (as is body hair in general), and female dwarves without beards will often grow out their sideburns.


15. Do you do any "funny voices" or accents when portraying? If so, what are they? 
Usually only for comedic characters, which usually boil down to “bloviating wizard”, “Eeyore”, and “goblin”.


16. Do you have any stories from games that your players can't stop talking about? 

Since I don't really have consistent groups I don't have many player stories, but I have plenty of Gm stories; the con game of Dead Planet I ran a couple years ago remains a highlight, when the players managed to open up the Gaunt hive in the Red Tower barracks without any casualties by tossing in a homemade gas bomb and welding the door shut as the player in maggot armor held it in place. Weird to recount a story of players committing war crimes as entertainment, but the clever thinking on their feet was just so good.


17. Do you take breaks during a game? Are they on a schedule or ad hoc? 
Ad hoc, usually around the mid-point and hour / hour and a half in.


18. Do you use "critical hits" or "fumbles" in your games? What have they added? 
The real benefit for a crit of either variety is that they provide a great opportunity for you to ask a player “all right, how does that play out?” They’re a tool for engagement.


19. Do you use music at the table? If so, what are some examples? If not then why? 

I’ve done it a couple times in the past (Waaaaaaaaaay back when I ran Deep Carbon Observatory, I used Elegiac for going upriver and Flutter Fly for the dueling wizard encounter), but I’ve found it low-benefit to high-hassle on the whole.


20. Does alignment ever change, what kind of things would lead to that? 
Changing either your political or spiritual alliance, depending on how I am interpreting alignment at that given moment.


21. Draw or describe a treasure map your players might discover in play 
A  grid of street patterns scribbled on the back of a receipt: the only indication of actual locations are a circled X and a handful of very loose interpretations of fast food logos.


22. Have you ever fudged die rolls? Do you have strong feelings about the concept? 

I’m most likely to fudge enemy health rather than rolls; if the players have the situation under control / it’s starting to get boring, I’ll just decide 1-3 more hits will do it in if it’s not going to surrender or run off.


23. How are skeletons made? Ghouls? Why haven't wraiths/vampires taken over? 
Skeletons are made by binding a minor spirit to a bunch of bones. They can follow some basic commands, and work a bit better when the spirit is the shade of an appropriate species (i.e. the shades of dead humans are best for a human skeleton, though the skeleton and shade don’t have to be from the same person.

The original ghouls were a species of entelodont that got imprinted in a specific shoggoth gene line, and emerge in the modern day as the result of a prion disease that causes all sorts of epigenetic / retroviral fuckery when a body containing dormant imprinted cells is cannibalized.

Ghosts and undead exist in their own ecosystems with checks and balances via predator-prey relationships. Vampires are something of the equivalent of a tiger - solitary predators with very large territories. Either that or horrible tick monsters.


24. How big does a dungeon have to be to qualify for the "mega" appellation? 

Big enough that the campaign setting doesn’t exist concretely outside of it: the dungeon is the setting.


25. How common are adventurers? How are they treated generally by normal folk?

Adventurers are migrant workers, so the locals’ opinions on them will vary a lot according to the present economic situation and assorted intersections of race and class. They go where the (monster hunting) work is, and so will usually make seasonal rounds (often as part of a circus) and use the winter for rest and recovery.


Saturday, January 24, 2026

Dan Plays Games 10

I really need to make an index for these. 

 

Forward Escape the Fold

Previous game of the Pyrene devs. A simple roguelite where you have a 3-wide column of cards laid out in each level full of monsters / items / potions / etc, but you can only ever move forward (straight or diagonal). The art is nice, but doesn’t feel like it has a particularly strong identity beyond a light dusting of vibes (Pyrene does much better in this regard.). While enjoyable to play for a few rounds, the gameplay loop and lightweight progression system didn't really grip me.



Asbury Pines

Idle game with a generations-spanning murder mystery plot at the center. I normally stay away from idle games because they play like hell with my ADHD (this one did too, but it seems some later patches have addressed this), but the narrative focus on this one got me to check it out and I was pleased with the experience. Being able to follow characters for decades and then having to spend time with them because of the nature of the idle elements was really effective at getting me attached to the cast. I wanted to see things turn out well, but then so-and-so dies for stupid or tragic or avoidable reasons and time keeps on going. I think the final arc and ending were a bit weak, but I was still invested even then. It does an extremely good job of letting the time scales sink in, where you will find yourself thinking of characters you liked generations or even centuries ago but never really in a way where you resent their absence, since the current batch of characters give you equal insight into the trials and tribulations of their lives.

Also, despite being an idle game murder mystery, there are Civ-style tech trees for civic, religious, and scientific advancement, and religion unlock #2 is "giant ground sloth cult" - a thing that has no concrete archaeological evidence for its existence (to my knowledge), but has non-zero odds of having existed. Do with that what you will.



Dungeon Encounters

A sort of minimum-viable dungeoncrawler, stripped down to the absolute bare bones - I don’t think that’s a good thing.

There’s no real story outside of a couple short paragraphs for each party member; your characters’ only stats are HP and equipment points; Special abilities are unlocked and applied on the party level, so character builds or specializations don’t really exist; there are no battle items and none plus one (max health boost) outside of fights; the only variables in weapons or magic are 1-target vs multi-target, set damage vs random damage, and if it can hit flying enemies or not; the dungeon has basically no interactivity besides some hidden treasures; equipment drops from enemies are extremely rare; there is no auto-explore function despite the dungeon being mostly empty, featureless hallways; there is supposedly some way to speed up the battles but I was unable to find it; the default keyboard controls are never-before-witnessed levels of intuitive.

The end result of the experiment is primarily tedium. There are threats that can wipe you easily in ways that seem unfair compared to other games (a thief enemy can put you into massive debt if you get hit), but there are likewise easy ways to completely negate those threats (I got a passive skill early on that just gives my party total immunity to poison). There are multiple enemy abilities that can just remove a character from your party if they hit, and you’re stuck on a tedious journey to get them back or find a replacement. Movement abilities plus being able to identify what monsters are in an encounter before the fight starts mean that by the time you hit dungeon level 25 you can avoid basically all the tough fights if you want to. If you party wipe, you have to start with level 1 characters and can’t even use the good loot you’ve unlocked and have to grind out THE ENTIRE THING AGAIN. 

The best quality it possesses is, in some moments, you can play it on autopilot and not think about it, and if that’s what you’re after I’m certain there are much better games to scratch the itch.



Nuclear Throne

Picked it back up after many years away, thanks to the recent 10 year anniversary patch. I’m still absolutely terrible at the game - like truly, remarkably dogshit at it - but it's still got the sauce. I’d call it one of the perfect games; nothing needs added, nothing needs removed. The machine gun thumps like a bass drum and it just feels good to play.



Ye Guild Clerk

Short freebie, you play as a clerk for an adventuring guild, giving people missions and seeing how that works out for them. Takes maybe half an hour to complete, though all the adventurers can end the game positive or negative with you so there’s a replay in there if you dig it. I can easily imagine an expanded version.



Neon White

GOTTA. GO. FAST. 

It doesn’t matter one bit if you don’t care about the mid/late-aughts Deviantart-core narrative or are super-duper competitive with the speedrunning element: there’s a skip button and the progression gates are easily overcome. There are character-based bonus levels you can unlock but again, skip button means you can get right to the challenges if you don't care about the characters.

The difficulty of normal levels is self-imposed (how fast do you want to get?), which I think is an extremely good way of designing things. Also the soundtrack slaps.


Stackflow

Balatro, if it was Tetris. Still in early access but even with the small amount of content (and no metaprogression) I found myself playing and enjoying quite a bit. Tetris is Tetris and it’s difficult to go wrong with Tetris, and even with the limited number of special blocks and perks in the game at time of writing, it's still enough to keep me engaged for a solid amount of time. I do think it needs a good chunk more content to hang on for the long haul vs the many options for standard Tetris out there, though. The most recent update (0.10) came out between when I started and finished this review; while not particularly big, it is a step in the right direction. 

 

Monsters are Coming!: Rock and Road

I can’t really recommend this one, though I am sad to say it. It’s a perfectly servicable, functional game. You have a city that moves along a path at a set rate, you move your little guy around harvesting resources and fighting monsters, you expand your city, all that works on a moment to moment level.

The issue is that this is really all there is. There are unlocks, but none of the ones I have gotten have changed how I approached the game at all. The routes you can choose are differentiated by only a few variables and each run has a set-in-stone pacing due to the auto scrolling city. After you’ve done a handful of runs you've seen most of what the game has to offer.
 

 

Uncle Chop's Rocket Shop

A roguelite about being a four-eyed fox-headed cartoon man in a dumpy space station, fixing spaceships with only your in-universe manual to help you. I love this game's premise, I love its vibe, I love sitting down and rolling through some jobs. There's a fun sense of satisfaction of going from terribly confused to "oh I can do this module with no trouble at all." The game rewards player knowledge in the way that most TTRPGs can only dream of.

However: there are a handful of bullshit moments that yank me right out of the moment and set off the "it's time to take a break" notification. A certain amount of friction is to be expected, especially towards the end of a run, but these come as particularly jarring. 

  • Reactor jobs can tank a run before you realize what the problem is (understandable and appropriate, so this isn't really a flaw, but it is a frustration point. You gotta remove that core NOW.)
  • The faction endings introduce new and sometimes obtuse mechanics that don't always gel (Lawmakers in particular is absolutely miserable: you have to babysit a battlestation and keep the ammo topped off, but in order to move between the gun and the dispenser you have to take a single-person elevator that is also being used by the other crewmembers who are, in my unscientific opinion, the slowest motherfuckers to ever exist in this universe of base matter.
  • The meteor shower hazard just makes ships catch on fire constantly (there's no buffer period, so a fire can start literally as soon as you finish putting out the last one) and can be completely negated with a cheap permanent upgrade (like you can probably afford it after your first one or two runs and then never have to deal with meteors again, which begs the question of why they are in the game.)

A more general issue is that the game has no manual save, and only autosaves after every day of work (normally three ships) - depending on how good you are and how complex the fix-it jobs are, you're looking at a substantial chunk of time that you have to devote to the game in one go - it's not a pick up and play a round while you're on break kind of game. I understand why (cuts down on save scumming), but it is still frustrating and leads me to pass it over in favor of other games.

Still, all that aside, it's a weird little game that provides a unique experience and I'd recommend it to anyone who thinks the concept sounds fun, because even with all the frustrations listed above it is fun. I've considered printing out a hard copy of the manual, just for giggles. Maybe as Mothership prop. No idea how you'd adapt the puzzles to Mothership, but....actually hold on to that.

(Speaking of Mothership - surprisingly relevant content despite the aesthetic. The cyborg hivemind is made of desperate people trying to escape debt, you're a "devotee" instead of an employee, there's an interplanetary treasure-hunting faction that's really just an MLM scheme sifting through garbage, stuff like that. It's good!) 

**

The Gameable Content Bonus 

Uncle Chop's ship module repair for tabletop

Spitballing here, gonna get loosey goosey for a moment. You give the players a print-out or pdf of the Uncle Chop's manual (or your own bespoke equivalent). Players do their thing until they need to fix a ship module. You tell them the symptoms / problem. Players then have to either find, replace, or build replacement parts to solve the puzzle. 

**

Ground Sloth Worship in Pleistocene North America (Corvee, Alan; 1992)

For Players: A brief text outlining Corvee's hypothesis that large swathes of the Midwest and Appalachia were dominated by the worship of giant ground sloths at the end of the Ice Age. While surprisingly restrained in tone for a text of this subject matter, even cursory examination of other sources reveals that Corvee's conclusions are not supported at all by mainstream archaeology.

For Handlers: The book is intended to plant the idea in the players' minds before revealing related evidence, rather than containing any direct Mythos material. It would work as a good trailhead or supplemental evidence for a plot involving Tsathoggua (sloth-god), the Voormis (sloth people), Clark Ashton Smith's Hyperborean material (reframed as the ice-age Americas, with "Hyperborea" coming from Greek mis-interpretation of the Book of Eibon), the K'n-Yani (who worship Tsathoggua and live under the Americas) and the assorted New-Age lore of Mount Shasta (Mount Voormithadreth, anyone?). Practically writes itself.


Sunday, January 18, 2026

Slushpile 18

Tis the season, the season of slush.  I'm pretty sure this is the biggest one yet.

Slushpile Index

  1. Salt in food has made it much harder for demons to possess people
  2. The division of first beings into those who have no part in the world, those who devote all things to maintaining it, those who take an active role within it
  3. A recurring question in medieval Christianity:  “Did Christ also die for the orcs?”
  4. Trial by ordeal but it's just making the arrest: if she was actually an evil witch you'd be dead the moment you cross the property line, so no need to toss her in a lake.
  5. The spell to turn one’s spirit into a banshee is a secret art of women - a practice of last-ditch defence against men who wish them harm.
  6. The cult had fallen out of practice well before the arrival of the Four Prophets and the Epistles of Fire, and so very little information remains.
  7. The Twelve Houses of Balosar
  8. Oberon’s Tower hostel, just outside Lang-Mer’s Poor Gate.
  9. Kona Hafhandsdottir - A sword for hire, from the northern fjordlands.
  10. Makhan - A mendicant sword-priest from the lands beyond Prester John’s country.
  11. “Here is one thing, there another. The stone has ten thousand teachers.”
  12. Drow Ambassador: “Yes, yes, I’ve seen the cartoons. Your political comics are men of unparalleled creativity: who could have possibly imagined such witticisms as ‘foreigner bad’ or ‘woman stupid’? If that’s the best they can do I don't think they're paying much attention.”
  13. Atlantida: volcanic island off the northern coast of Brazil. Former Portuguese colony.
  14. “It’s all in the Vibe. Gotta have the ineffable sauce.”
  15. “I am very tired and want to go home. In a cosmological sense.”
  16. “There can be no Eden without gardeners, without those who love rich soil and clean water and old, old trees. It cannot be built nor sustained without callused hands and tired feet, without aching back and nails blackened with dirt. Perhaps the only difference between heaven and hell is whether the day’s labor ends with satisfaction or despair."
  17. Dwarves associated with Hades / Pluto because of underground wealth.
  18. DOVER BATHOS has remained at Anomalous Organism Storage Facility 05 since 1998.
  19. Wherever the polyps emerged, they began to build enormous, hivelike arcologies of stone.
  20. "Because they are alive, and we are not.”
  21. Dream: Kittan’s youngest sister from TTGL shirts SHUT UP MOON MAN to the tune of Rob Zombie's “living dead girl”.
  22. Martin had sworn to himself that he’d throw the next reporter to mention Sapir-Whorf out the nearest window, mostly in jest and frustration, and not sixteen hours later he was asked by a man from Scientific General if language dictated thought. He didn’t throw the reporter out the window, but he definitely wanted to, in a harmless, cartoon-physics sort of way.
  23. Action / reaction / willpower (resist mental) / toughness (resist body)
  24. Lost/anomalous media: medieval manuscript marginalia of Homestar characters
  25. Dream: There is a basilosaurus in the lake, though it’s more of a nuisance than a danger.
  26. To the king, that which cannot be enslaved - cannot be made property - must be destroyed. Seven hundred princes pledged allegiance to his banner, and his war parties returned to the palace so laden with treasure that they would break the backs of the pack mules.
  27. Lothlorien is beautiful because the trees were loved (if only they loved their neighbors half as much, the pricks)
  28. Anime that don’t exist: Grotty cult-classic sci-fi OVA, major MoSh fuel.
  29. While translated as “mother”, the term is typically un gendered, and refers to anyone with the primary role of caring for and teaching a creche.
  30. “You shall have your vengeance, but you shall not become it.”
  31. Ribbon I want to do for convention Mothership games: “I died alone in space”
  32. If magic is a beam of light, a rite is a series of focusing lenses that directs it through the prism of some unlucky bastard
  33.  An anomalous transmission from the Voyager 1 spacecraft beginning November 18 2023. Situation is developing and under observation. 
  34. …slipping out of the knotted dead-ends of time space when there is food to be had and the brane is thin…
  35. The Door in the Wall
  36. Alternate stat names: athletic aptitude, fast action, book smarts, street smarts, people skills
  37. Missives from the Future: Transtemporal Stochastic Terrorism and its Effects on American Society (Jemison, 2025)
  38. “Ganymede STC this is Oriole on final approach” “Copy that, Oriole, you’re cleared for docking, spur 4, bay 12.”
  39. Laying on a straw mattress, listening to the crickets outside
  40. Affix designating loanwords / phonetic spelling
  41. “May this worthless blade be driven into a plowshare.”
  42. Three common demons: guilt, despair, addiction
  43. The etymology for cannabis is extremely murky, as it turns out. Heroditus claims it was from the Scythians, so you should give it to the amazons in your setting, at least.
  44. If Lovecraft or one of his imitators had written the Red Pool, there would have been a character proclaiming without evidence that it was the spilled blood of Yog-Sothoth. This is a bad example because that's a fucking rad idea.
  45. Generic Vernacular Fantasyland as alternate / echoed version of early 400s Britain; post Roman withdrawal (+ancient ruins), beginning of Angle-Saxon migrations / invasions (+orc stand-ins)
  46. Planet where entire population descended from emulations of very limited original colonist population
  47. Su’amatsanidan - I think this is supposed to gloss as “abstract mother-ship-person”, so it’s probably a term for a personified spaceship.
  48. The Dust House / ANTIPETRICHOR
  49. Radio in the kitchen: Preset stations pick up [spooky things]
  50. 60 Years ecophage threats adapted for DG or MoSh.
  51. Angga - paleolithic shamaness, maybe Willendorf herself
  52. A priest of Mantuka, Devourer-of-Demons: More like a mountain that walks than a man
  53. The Headhunters are not conscious - they are investigating humans primarily because self-awareness should have killed us a long time ago. We are an anomaly. Their experiments leave behind entire planets of human-derived livestock
  54. Spec evo seed world but can only use SCP articles tagged with some sort of life form (animal, plant, fungus, species, etc) (or otherwise describe a clade of organisms)
  55. DG agent: Sr. Margaret Tan - ~50 years old, small build, blue windbreaker, shotgun.
  56. Morale is low: it is dark, and cold, and I would like to rest
  57. The mosaic empire of the elves across the northern desert
  58. A Lot of Zeroes premise I want to use: after detection of an alien megastructure, my spaceship is sent to panspermia the trail between it and Sol. 
  59. Baqwoman - a title / profession
  60. The sagani may take up divine mantles, but they do so by a different path than men.
  61. The human/sapient prefix can be applied to non-sapient things as a personifier; different cultures will extend this to different things - ships, ainimae, exoselves.
  62. Conlang idea - the language of Hole / Throne: the fossilized court of azathoth. Uses kanji and also Cherokee syllabary?
  63. Dorothy, Alice, Lirazel vs John Carter’s invasion force; Carter overestimates how easy it is to return to earth gravity.
  64. “He has need for neither posturing nor for glory: He’s going to kill a motherfucker and be done with it.”
  65.  Δ-Class Citizen: colonial population support program (clone body, soul tether sigils)
  66. You ever think about that bit in the tartakovsky clone wars where the Nelvaani kid recognizes and accepts his father despite his father having been turned into a monster?
  67. The Eldest of Elders (Elden Beast) = transapient Elder Thing conglomerate (can embody in an avatar-body);   The binding ring (Elden Ring) = shoggoth tree-of-life command & control function.
  68. Neanderthal body found frozen in permafrost, sufficiently preserved that a genome can be sequenced by porting in leftovers in modern humans.
  69. CAPRA - Civic Anomalous Phenomena Response Agency 
  70. Elephant variants: miniature, stilt, extremely colorful, rooter/tusker, many trunks 
  71. Corvid variants: sun thief / golden-head raven, carnivale (parrot-like), thunderers, neoraptors
  72. Cetacean variants: neo-ambulocetus, cyborg / walker-bots, whalesong-possessed humans, skywhales
  73. Octopi variants: gasbag, shelled 
  74. Paraphrasing cosmicorrery: A word to describe the feeling of sadness when one sees activities, games, or decorations put together in attempt to be Fun go unused, ignored, or dismissed. 
  75. Cheap & easy conlang idea: take Latin then apply sound changes of Proto-Celtic to Old Irish, or take Proto-Celtic and apply sound changes of Latin to French or Occitan.
  76. Via Robwords' episode on the etymology of dog: there are medeival English records that mention men named Wilfric Pig, Willelmo Hog, Roger le Doge, William le Frogge.
  77. Extremely important historical fact: there were riots against the Inquisition in Carcassonne ~1300. The module writes itself!
  78. Via Black Forager: Racahout - ground acorns in milk, a pre-chocolate hot chocolate
  79. Echidna as mother of monsters but also progenitor of humanity
  80. DG shotgun scenario: Inventory Day - Program agents are tasked with taking inventory at the Book Depository (old missile silo?), a long-term storage facility for weird shit. Naturally, among all the recovered Green Boxes, there is something horrible and unexpected.
  81. “I attract strange people like honey attracts flies. There could be a talking monkey at my door and it wouldn’t be surprising.” 
  82. The Spear of Lu - At forty-one confirmed kills, she is one of the most-veteran ships in the OSMAT fleets. 
  83. The Pentaregia of Sigma Draconis
  84. Demons that induce the sin vs demons that embody the sin as discrete orders of demon
  85. Conjuration of spirits used to bypass development of scientific experimentation, because you can just ask a thing how it works.
  86. Firebird units: Burner / Phoenix / Militia / Fireteam / Burnout
  87. Courtly romance (n): wholly divorced from human experience, it contains no elements of an actual relationship and mostly serves as justification for men with power to cheat on their spouses. Guinevere never has to deal with Lancelot thrashing around in bed because of his PTSD dreams. 
  88. Via Just King Things: M. John Harrison said that the editorial choice that saved his horror story The Ice Monkey was going back, removing the exposition, and keeping everything else intact.
  89. In an effort to save the library from the encroaching polyps, a large chunk of the time space superstructure is violently torn out of reality. Some ruins are left behind, discovered so much later by the troodontids and humans. The yithians regroup in the distant future. Those that remain inside, unable to transmigrate or continue a population of conomorphs, attempt to develop other hosts. While they succeed, their minds are reduced to instinct, and these new docents tend to tomes they can neither read nor understand.
  90. The triple hierophant - a towering exultant; long straight black hair, golden robes that appear to glow, headpiece like a sunburst
  91. Idea: What if the existence of working conjuring means that you can kind of sidestep a lot of experimental science by just asking something "how do you work?"
  92. You'd think that by this point goblins should would know to avoid adventurers
  93. The problem with “work to live, not live to work” is that it still contains the unspoken and implicit corollary of “and those who don’t work, don’t get to live.”
  94. FTL that autocorrects for paradoxes by removing the vessel from perception from all frames of reference. One it jumps it is fucking gone
  95. Demon that causes miscarriages as male, bucking folkloric trend
  96. Demon: A white bull ox ridden by a giant, blood-drenched man bound in hair-ropes. Blinded, cock like a flagpole
  97. Appalachian Tsathoggua: I can't explain why it feels right, but it does.
  98. Stealthy night monster identified by the sound of its grinding teeth
  99. Lemman - Middle English word for one's lover, from Old English lēof +‎ mann. Gender neutral. We could stand to bring this one back, it's very useful. (Thanks to the Maniculum for pointing it out.)  
  100. Goldberg polyhedrons: a sphere made of hexes, which is probably useful to y'all.
  101. Language where the word for "wealthy" shares the same root as the word for fat.
  102. I remember an old LP of Jurassic Park Trespasser that I enjoyed, really need to find it again. Old old, like definitely over a decade.
  103. "Forgiveness is not transactional! Mercy is not a fucking gacha machine you can just feed tokens into until what you did is okay!"
  104. For MoSh: Marines get sidearm, Teamsters get toolkit, Scientists get research database, Androids get logic core
  105. Tostées dorées - French toast, when you're already in France.
  106. Slimes are dragon vomit, containing bits and pieces of inedible matter like an owl pellet.
  107. Runaway Station; phantom train stop that appears to a quartet of kids who have fled the residential school. 
  108. Sour Stripes ? Sour Strips? Google gives me candy but I swear that was the name of the band.
  109. Everyone goes for “oh the necronomicon is bound in human skin” and no one bothers asking “okay, whose skin is it? Seems like a lot of trouble. And honestly how can they even tell, it's leather! It is leather, right? It'd be rotting away if it wasn't..."
  110. Japanese "starving woman" cryptid
  111. Gravity was formulated relatively early, thanks to a monastic order high in the mountains, whose meditative practices involved rolling polished stone balls onto a taut sheet of silk or canvas that was shaped into a funnel by a central stone, and divining according to how the balls spiraled. 
  112. Via Dr. Sledge: in Talmudic demonology, Shabiri / Shabriri (I couldn't discern if that first r was there when he said it) is the demon of night-blindness. Fair to assume that Miyazaki did that intentionally.
  113. Knight errant as the fantasy of “get the cool parts of the military estate without the feudalism”
  114. Lawful demons tempt into sin; chaotic demons embody it 
  115. “The Knight” or “”The Lord”; an undead or possessed suit of armor to defend the town 
  116. Combative magic is difficult and rare because most spirits will just refuse to do it 
  117. A language: SVO, analytic. It possesses no tense but sufficient aspect
  118. The sin of Power, combining within itself cruelty, greed, and pride
  119. Video game Sea of Rifts uses "Exposure" instead of stability / insight / sanity, and I think I like it best of all. You don't understand it, but you're changed all the same. 
  120. The angel corpse falls to seafloor and is covered with silts; geological upraising of the region, plus hundreds of millions of years of erosion, will lead to its discovery inside a mountain.


**

RED HED


A withered body, bluish-grey like colloidal silver poisoning. A swollen rubbery sphere, candy apple red and six feet across, grows out of its head, hanging in the air like a water balloon pulled by an unseen center of gravity high above. Its splay-toed feet are on backwards.

  • Wounds: 2(20)
  • Instinct: 40
  • Combat: Non-Continguous Cutting Motion (30)
    • Line-of-sight
    • Seven-fingered hands and three-jointed arms snap into a sequence of angular contortions. Flesh is cut with the knife that is not.
    • On failure: 3d10 damage, SAN save to negate
    • One success: 1 wound (Blade), SAN save to reduce to failure result.


Ambrosia
The heavy, non-Newtonian fluid within the acephalonic sac is highly alkaline. It splashes over everything at Close range, damaging objects and burning exposed skin (1d10/round). Poison fumes burn eyes, mouth, nose; anyone who comes within Close range without eye protection will be temporarily blinded. Can be diluted with (large quantities of) water. Reacts with violent foaming reaction if acid is applied.


**


“Hi! My name’s Luce!”

Miriam looked at the girl on the doorstep and wondered for a moment why the last twenty-odd years of her life were regularly punctuated by the strangest people imaginable. She brushed the thought aside: the girl with blue hair was not nearly as strange as the talking monkey and confused monk, or the clay doves, or the choir of burning eyes, or the stone-bodied messenger, or any number of impossible things that seemed to follow her like dust on her heels.

“Are you lost?” Miriam asked.

“I’m on pilgrimage!” The girl said, beaming. “But I don’t know if I’m in the right place. So maybe I am lost.”

Miriam nodded. That made more sense.

“If you’re looking for Yeshua, he’s out with his brothers on a job. He’ll be back by sundown.”

**

 “You are so very concerned with whether things are real and care nothing for if they are true. When I woke up this morning, I went into the woods and pissed on a tree. That is real. If I tell the story of Chukan and how he tried to steal the sun’s wedding garment for his beloved, is it less true because I do not include every time he stopped and pissed against a tree? What bearing does that have on the story of a youth in the grips of lovesickness? The sun does not have garments, and even if he did, they would be far too large.” [Footnote: this size discrepancy is brought up in most versions of the story]

** 

Principle of Anthropocentic Expectation

It is always possible that a supernatural entity, either on their own or through external influence, is, artificially adjusting their appearance, properties, or circumstances so as to align with pre-existing human expectations; this may be embodied in tropes such as “people see what they think they should see” or “they picked this form because it was already familiar”, or it may be an intentional misdirection on the part of the supernatural entity.

** 

 

Please get these drafts out of my docs they have been sitting here for YEARS. 

 

Scrap Post 1: Making Better Transhuman Chargen

(Initially) an attempt to fix Eclipse Phase’s wonky morph system, that then turned into a broad sketch for a fully modular Knave-style slot-based build-a-character system.

Reason to Scrap It: The premise is so broad that my attempt to make a general-purpose system floundered (turns out, transhuman sci-fi is an extremely broad conceptual category) and I’d have to make an entire setting to give it anything substantial to work on, and I don’t enough about the idea to go to that work. I might dig it back


Scrap Post 2: Building the Verse (but Better)

Taking the oddly detailed numbers of Firefly’s Verse, plus some help from PlanetPlanet, and rebuilding the setting with some hard-science solar system generator or another for a slightly-more-realistic version.

Reason to Scrap It: The map is the only thing I particularly like about Firefly and while the numbers are useful, I’d need to re-arrange the system anyway to make it stable and at that point why not just make it wholly original.

 

Scrapped Post 3: Building a Fantasy Solar System

Either a collection of tables, an essay, or a worked example (or all three) to do what it said in the title.

Reason to Scrap It: Not enough substantial material to justify it as a standalone post. I still want to do something with the idea, since I am a fan of that tiny tiny Venn overlap of high fantasy and hard space science that basically no one else lives in, but if I do I'm going to just skip ahead to “making a solar system”. Probably for MSF, though the advantage of this method is that you can kinda just swap it into whatever setting because so few fantasy RPGs care about other planets.
 

Wednesday, January 14, 2026

Proto-Indo-European Resource Masterpost

Last Updated 1/14/26 

As I spent a large chunk of 2025 going down the rabbit hole of historical linguistics, I read a lot of extremely niche academic papers, obscure blogposts, and assorted crackpot theories: I’ve gathered all the ones I can remember here to offset the field's bullheaded resistance to ever putting anything in one place. Heaven forbid academic reference material be easy to find.

This will, of course, be a curated list shaped by my own interests and biases. If you're here because you want to get into hobbyist PIE linguistics, I encourage you to assemble your own trove.

**

Important Lessons to Know Going In

  1. Reconstructed PIE is a model - it's highly flawed, it's not an accurate representation of the historical reality, but it is the best we've got at the moment.
  2. Many resources online are out of date; there is no centralized database.
  3. Wikipedia is not a good source to get in-depth information about PIE topics, only to learn that the topics exist. You will likely find yourself having to unlearn things like I did.
  4. Literally anyone can post stuff to Academia.edu (which is a exceedingly enshittified website), and because the recommendation algorithm is a blind and senseless deity Academia.edu will regularly recommend you pdfs that are not peer reviewed / are not good scholarship / are not coherent and functional as a linguistics text / are basically just blog posts to a greater or lesser degree of quality.
  5. PIE the language changed radically over time, especially when comparing before and after Anatolian split off: PIE the reconstruction rarely takes this into account.
  6. The laryngeals are a headache and I highly recommend removing them immediately, or at the very least being judicious about where they are kept. 
  7. Go through morphology and lop off the stuff you know you don't want to keep before you start sound changes.
  8. Sometimes you need to make an arbitrary choice and stick with it: sound changes are a rabbit hole: go in with a target and don't let yourself get waylaid by what-ifs.
  9. Word-building is actually easier if you just make them yourself from a root list and the endings.
  10.  THE SPIRIT OF THE LAW IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE LETTER - if you have to fudge things to make the project work, fudge to your heart's content. The rules are made up & the points don't matter. 

**

The Indo-European Conlang Checklist

  1. So, why are you doing this? (d4)
    1. I like difficult and complex puzzles
    2. I am classically, King Lear Act 4 insane
    3. I have a high tolerance to frustration  
    4. I am desperate for a distraction from The Horrors 
  2. Have you reconsidered? (d3)
    1. Now that you mention it, backing out seems like a good idea.
    2. Ha-ha, I'm in danger! 
    3. I barely consider things the first time: full steam ahead!
  3. Are you sure? How about a sub-family? They're more reasonable. (d10)
    1. Proto-Albanian
    2. Proto-Anatolian
    3. Proto-Armenian
    4. Proto-Balto-Slavic
    5. Proto-Celtic
    6. Proto-Germanic
    7. Proto-Hellenic
    8. Proto-Indo-Iranian
    9. Proto-Italic
    10. Proto-Tocharian
  4. Won't be dissuaded? Suit yourself. How are you handling the laryngeals? (d12)
    1. I'm deleting them immediately, like a sane person would. 
    2. Rasmussen - h / x / ɣʷ 
    3. Kloekhorst - ʔ / q(ː) / q(ː)ʷ 
    4. Lindeman - x́, ɣ́ / x, ɣ / xʷ, ɣʷ 
    5. Keiler - / h / ħ / ʕ
    6. Bomhard 1 - ʔ / x / ɣ 
    7. Beekes -  ʔ / ʕ / ʕʷ 
    8. Kümmel - h / χ / ʁ 
    9. Meier-Brügger - ʔ / x / ɣ(ʷ) 
    10. Kortlandt -  ʔ / q~χ / qʷ~χʷ
    11. Pooth - ʔ / χ / ʕ
    12. Ringe -  ç / x / xʷ
  5. And if those are too normal for you... (d4)
    1. Szemerenyi - h [1]
    2. Martinet -  ʔ, h / χ , ʁ, ħ, ʕ / χʷ , ʁʷ, ħʷ, ʕʷ [2]
    3. Bomhard 2 - ʔ / ħ͡h / ʕ͡ħ / h [3]
    4. Pyysalo - aɦ / ɦa [4]
  6. Glottalic theory: yea or nay? (d10)
    1. Traditional - Plain / Voiced / Breathy
    2. Hopper - Plain / Ejective / Voiced
    3. Gamkrelidze and Ivanov - Aspirated / Ejective / Breathy
    4. Beekes - Plain / Preglottalized / Aspirated
    5. Kümmel - Plain / Implosive / Voiced
    6. Clackson - Plain / Creaky / Breathy
    7. Shcirru - Plain / Preglottalized / Slack
    8. Kortlandt - Geminated / Ejective / Plain
    9. The Tocharian Option - Fuck all this, collapse everything to plain unvoiced stops.
    10. Fuck it, they were actually affricates [5]
  7. Centum, Satem, or the Forbidden Third Option? (d4)
    1. Centum - Get that god damn palatovelar series out of here.
    2. Satem - There will be no labialized consonants under this roof thank you very much.
    3. Menage a troistem - All three dorsal series are present, no there will not be an explanation. [6]
    4. Qantum - plain velars were actually uvular, palatovelars were plain. [7]
  8. How are thorn ([alveolar stop]+[velar stop]) clusters getting resolved? (d8)
    1. No change; TK => TK
    2. Metathesis; TK => KT
    3. Assibilation; TK => sK
    4. Deletion; TK => *K
    5. Metathesis-Assibilation: TK =>KT => Ks
    6. Metathesis-Deletion: TK => KT => *T
    7. Metathesis-Assibilation-Deletion: TK => KT => Ks => *s
    8. Metathesis-Deletion-Affrication; TK => KT => *T => *Ts 
  9. Do the S be mobile? (d4)
    1. Mobile S is present in all cases. [8]
    2. Mobile S is absent in all cases. [8] 
    3. Mobile S is present seemingly at random 
    4. Not only is Mobile S absent, it seems like it never appeared in this branch: any roots that pattern as STeDh are now DheDh. [8]
  10. Am I finally done? (d1)
    1. No. You're in it now. Welcome to Wonderland, we're all mad here.

[1] - Not a mistype, just one laryngeal with no coloring effect: he supposes PIE just had more vowels and ablaut patterns than thought.

[2] - The book is in French so I have no idea how he defined which environments got what. 

[3] - As used in his book on Nostratic; the sounds used for h2 and h3 don't appear in PHOIBLE, Wikipedia, or cursory google search, so take that as you will.

[4] I'm including this one because it exists; I do not care to spend the time to wrap my head around this theory, which considering what I have spent that time on should say a lot.

[5] This is extremely unlikely in reality, and I don't know of anyone who actually supports it.

[6] To my knowledge, no daughter languages keep all three. Melchert claims that Luwian did, but it doesn't look like he has gotten significant support on this

[7] This is not an uncommon stance, and it does play nicely with the laryngeals being uvulars, but it isn't the mainstream of the model.

[8] To the best of my knowledge, three of the four options here are not extant, I just included them to make a table. 

** 

The rest of this post is going to be links to resources and citations, divvied up into categories. While I am grouping by quality, I am compiling by quantity, and so I will include sources do not align with the mainstream of the field, which may also be sources that I don't agree with / don't consider to be good sources / are just plain wrong: I will notate these accordingly. Those whose contents I have forgotten i make no such promises for.

Recommended Reading

Books I would recommend to people who don't give a shit about conlangs but are modestly interested in PIE. 
  • Beekes, Robert: Comparative Indo-European Linguistics: An Introduction (2011)
    •  This is probably the best general-audience overview you're going to find, or at least that I've found. Beekes manages to cover an enormous amount of material in an approachable and thorough manner and doesn't get lost in the weeds. 
  •  Mallory, J. P., D. Q. Adams: The Oxford Introduction to Proto-Indo European (2006)
    • The other gold standard. If you have bit of linguistics knowledge going in or a willingness to learn you'll have a good time. Where Beekes is the all-rounder, Mallory & Adams is more specific, divying up the reconstructed PIE vocabulary by topic and combing through to see which words are best attested, and how they came to be.

 

 

The Big 4

The ur-resources.

  • Pokorny, J. Indogermanisches Etymologisches Woerterbuch (Indo-European Etymological Dictionary) (1959)
    • Out-of-date. Does not contain laryngeals or Anatolian material. Still somehow the most approachable lexicon. You can find a cleaned-up online version via the University of Texas: if you want fewer moving parts for your project and don't care overly much about accuracy, it's servicable. There's also a edited / cleaned up / laryngeal-including version here, though I can't find who was behind it.
  • Rix, Helmut, Martin Kümmel et al. Lexikon der indogermanischen Verben (Lexicon of Indo-European Verbs, LIV)
    • Has not been translated into English.
  • Indo-European Etymological Dictionary Series
    • Incomplete; the project turns 35 next year and the promised grand unified replacement for Pokorny is most likely dead in the water - the most recent of the dictionaries was released in 2014. You can, of course, not find all of these in the same place, because Indo-Europeanists break out in hives when things are too convenient
  • Wikipedia & Wiktionary
    • A cobbled together mess; outdated information is everywhere, along with shoddy and questionable reconstructions. Use with caution.

You will notice that I throw shade on all these sources: this is because they are inadequate and are unlikely to ever be replaced. Your average fan wiki has better organization than this field. 

Andrew Byrd at the University of Kentucky has been working on DERBi PIE (Database of Etymological Roots Beginning in PIE), but the website is basically just a holding page and given how funding for the humanities has been going the odds of seeing it to completion are lower than even the extremely low rate of the field.

 

Top Billing

Articles which I think are good for just understanding PIE / the most useful ones for conlanging.

  • Byrd, Andrew: Reconstructing Indo-European Syllabification (2010)
    • Byrd's stuff is generally just good to look into, since he focuses a lot on reconstructing PIE as a language that people spoke over a algebraic formula. 
  • Byrd, Andrew: The Rules of Reconstruction: Making our Etymologies More Grounded (2017)
    • That is, if you can find his papers - I had found this paper on Academia within the last year, but since then it and all of Byrd's other papers have been pulled from that site and further searching led me expensive dead ends. I am reminded, once again, of why not going on to higher ed was a blessing, I would lose my fucking mind with this recursive walled garden.
  • Gąsiorowski, Piotr: The use and misuse of evidence in linguistic reconstruction (2012)
    • A useful reminder about how reconstructions are never set in stone, and how they can be shaped by bias and lack of data. 
  • Kiparsky, Paul: Compositional vs. Paradigmatic Approaches to Accent and Ablaut (20XX) 
    • Origin point for a (thankfully, it seems, gradually catching-on) alternative to the traditional PIE accentuation schema, which tosses out the rather arbitrary categories with a series of rules that can be applied to derive the patterns that have been reconstructed in a natural and logical manner. A few other works cited in this post build on this paper, and I'll mark them as such.
  • Kümmel, Martin: On new reconstructions of PIE "laryngeals", especially as uvular stops (2022)
    •  This is, in my amateur's opinion, the best argument I've yet seen made for the laryngeals and their identity: namely, that they pattern in Hittite like a fortis / lenis or unvoiced / voiced pair, and taking other  aspects into account were probably χ and ʁ, which he notes does not rule out earlier q and ɢ or later h, x, or ħ.
  • Kümmel, Martin: Typology and reconstruction: The consonants and vowels of Proto-Indo-European (2012)
    •  Wins a slot here for being simple and functional: he goes through the available evidence, compares it to the patterns of modern languages, and comes up with serviceable answers for the plain voiced series and the development of the vowel system.
  • Weiss, Michael: The Proto-Indo-European Laryngeals and the Name of Cilicia in the Iron Age (2016)
    • If Kümmel's 2022 paper above is the magic bullet, I consider this to be the smoking gun: when Hittite proper nouns were transliterated into neighboring languages such as Akkadian, the laryngeal descendant ḫ was consistently written with symbols for uvular consonants instead of pharyngeals (since Akkadian made that distinction and Hittite did not).
  • Yates, Anthony and Jesse Lundquist: The Morphology of Proto-Indo-European (2018) 
  • Yates, Anthony: (Reconstructing) stress assignment in Hittite and Proto-Indo-European (2016) 
    • Builds on Kiparsky: the Hittite evidence checks out in favor of the Compositional Theory.
  • Yates, Anthony: Some basics of Indo-European Phonology (2018)




Personal Wildcards

Articles that I, personally, think are great specifically for me, but which might not be particularly sturdy hypotheses or are otherwise nonstandard. We all get to have a couple Crank Credits as a treat, and these are mine.

  • Adiego, Ignasi-Xavier; A little-known law on the root and syllable structures of Proto-Indo-European (2022) 
    • This paper, combined with Jan’s below, has me convinced that at least some of the laryngeals were approximants formed by vowels breaking under stress, because there are a lot of roots that otherwise inexplicably pattern as CHVR. So much PIE scholarship ties itself in knots over *i and *u. If the same sound is *ew when stressed and *u when unstressed, that means that stress broke the vowel
  • Bičovský, Jan: Proto-Indo-European laryngeals and voicing assimilation (2019) 
    • h3 being treated as voiced and labialized has always felt weird to me, because neither of those traits are necessary to fulfill the criteria they supposedly fill: the voicing assimilation premise is based on exactly one word, and labialization is based on turning adjacent *e to *o, despite no other labialized consonants doing that. Jan here is in the same boat, and he lays out a solid case against the traditional reconstruction and paired argument for laryngeals as having both fricative and approximant realizations.
  • Gąsiorowski, Piotr: Another long grade: Non-canonical ablaut involving PIE *ā (2013) 
    • Speculation on the mechanisms that could lead to an *ā ./ *a ablaut series in PIE. I appreciate that it's labeled as non-canonical up front.
  • Monti, Nicolás: The twofold development of PIE *o in Greek, Italic and Celtic (2026-) and Again on the reflex of medial PIE *ō (2026-)
    • These papers have gotten several updates since I first became aware of them, so I'm linking Monti's main profile page instead. These are some pretty radical papers (as in, what they propose would rewrite half of the reconstructive model if true) and they are very much still WIPs, but they're also the sort of theory where I kinda want it to be true. Wanting doesn't mean being, of course, but the theory is easy to understand and can probably help simplify a lot of a conlang project.

 

Laryngeals & Laryngeal Accessories

Now you too can be driven to rend your garments and pluck out your beard like an old testament prophet whenever you see an H!


Other Phonology Articles

Because there are, in fact, non-laryngeal sounds in PIE

 

Roots and Syllables

Little nuggets of sound

 

Stress and Accent

Let me tell you how much I have come to hate mobile accent since I began this research...


Placeholder Category

For stuff that I either can't sort into a different category or can't be bothered to.

 

The Pooth Zone

Roland Pooth is either an absolute madman or 100% on the money, no in-between. His interpretation of PIE as a Semitic-style root-and-pattern language plus direct-inverse alignment is extremely out there, but even if he is completely wrong, he’s still made a cohesive and consistent model that provides coherent explanations for some of the otherwise inexplicable elements of the traditional model, and that’s a fair sight better than most of the field. I'm not linking his entire corpus here, but enough to give you an idea of what you'll be dealing with.

 

Indo-Uralic & long-range stuff, etc

Take all of this with a complimentary salt lick. I don't support any of these theories beyond "it'd be really cool if that was the case" / "yeah there's a good chance of a connection, but there's no way to prove it"; you'll find out in short order that people can make themselves a semi-convincing argument for a relationship between PIE and damn near anything, which will be entirely incompatible with every other semi-convincing argument. This is fine if you are doing Conlang Shit, because you can just arbitrarily pick a version you like and roll with that.

 

Helpful and / or Silly Stuff I Found on Reddit

It ain't peer-reviewed, but sometimes plain speech and the freedom to shoot the shit is fruitful. You will notice an abundance of links to r/linguisticshumor: this is because r/linguistics dried up under extremely strict posting rules.


Assorted Blogposts

Some of these are from 5-10 years before some sizable developments in the field, and so are a bit diminished when it comes to accuracy. But, they are amateurs for amateurs and that's got it's place, especially if your goal is conlang stuff and the spirit of the law takes priority over the letter.

 

I Do Not Vouch for These

Still potentially good for inspiration, though caveat that emptor.


Useful Resources

Don't leave home without 'em.

 

So What Have We Learned? 

The people writing fanfics about the statue that shits blood and then kills you instantly are better at organizing and cross-linking their work than historical linguists.