Sunday, July 8, 2018

Chambermaidens: Henry Justice Ford Monster Manual

For Eric Nieudan's bestiary project.

Chambermaidens

Armour class: as leather
Hit dice: 1
Move: 1 turn of fast, otherwise slow
Attacks: Fist (1d2)
No. Appearing: 1
Morale: 9
Treasure: Special (see below)
Alignment: Neutral or Good

A type of faerie native to all manner of pots, jars, and assorted earthenware containers. Typically take the form of beautiful women about a foot tall, wearing gowns of white, blue, or butterfly wing. Generally friendly, but very protective of their pots and the contents thereof. They greatly enjoy riddles and games, and so will ask visitors to bring them some obscure and obfuscated item for their help.

What Does the Chambermaid Desire?
  1. A peacock tailfeather.
  2. A crossword puzzle with no errors, done in pen by an orc.
  3. A gastrolith from a basilisk.
  4. A spirit of hope and open skies.
  5. An ogre's love letter.
  6. A shell that contains seven seas.
A befriended chambermaid can provide information about the dungeon, adjacent hexes, enchantments, or local monsters, and will be willing to share the contents of their pot.

What Does the Pot Contain?
  1. Enough stew to keep 10 men fed for a month.
  2. A pond's worth of cool, clean water.
  3. A wagon full of nightsoil.
  4. The scraps from 10 aurochs eaten by trolls.
  5. The mummified organs of a prince, wizard, or priest.
  6. Fine wine enough to keep an army drunk for days.
Breaking a chambermaiden's pot will release all of its contents at once, and produce one very angry chambermaid. Curses will fly.

2 comments:

  1. Had to do this as soon as I saw that the project was happening, and had to use this picture as soon as I saw the possible wordplay.

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  2. The implied gameplay here is great, especially if more than one Chambermaid is encountered (eventually.)

    The wordplay is a lovely cherry on top.

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